It’s easy to understand why someone would panic if they felt their partner had retreated or was no longer invested in the relationship. While all couples need autonomy and closeness, many couples struggle with the pursuer-distancer dance and experience pain when their partner is pulling away or withdrawing from them. According to marriage expert Harriet Lerner, […]
Dating after Divorce
Dating After Divorce: Why You Should Never Limit Yourself to One Goal
So many singles in the dating scene develop a kind of tunnel vision, zeroing in on one—and only one—goal. For some people, that’s finding a “soul mate” to marry and spend the rest of their life with. For others, it’s simply having a series of flings or good times. Understand that neither of these […]
Taking a Chance on Love a Second Time Around
If you allow yourself to be both brave and vulnerable, you might just find that love really can be lovelier the second time around.
5 Reasons Why Keeping Secrets Can Destroy a Relationship
If you find yourself keeping secrets from your partners, it’s important to remember you could be destroying your relationship. Here’s why.
6 Ways to Put Divorce Behind You in the New Year
The New Year is a good time to rethink how a recent divorce may still be impacting your daily life. While I respect that your marriage was significant and ending it was a real lifetime trauma, there is life after divorce. Look around you and see all the happy people, many of whom are divorced […]
Top 5 Breakup Movies of All Time
As New Year’s quickly approaches, some may be feeling down about their loves lost over the years. It’s essential to your overall wellbeing that you continue to laugh and entertain yourself. As the great Charlie Chaplin once said, “To truly laugh, you must be able to take your pain and play with it.” And as […]
9 New Year’s Resolutions for the Newly Divorced
The New Year is a perfect time to reassess the previous year and set new goals. These resolutions are not to eat better or drink less; these will help you become the person you deserve to be. A divorce can rock your self-esteem and entire worldview. But, if you’re diligent, you can turn this difficult […]
How I Learned To Love Alone Time
Funny thing about divorce, I never knew how much I hated having alone time. Just lying in bed at night alone in my apartment on nights that he had the boys were so hard. I would either watch TV or read until I couldn’t bear to keep my eyes open any longer. I felt scared. Every […]
How Many Divorces?
I recently attended a big family holiday party. Between the happy couple who hosted this festive occasion, their parents, aunts, uncles and siblings, 14 people in all, 14 divorces were represented (one person had two, and one had none). All are now in happy, committed relationships: some marriages, some relationships of long-standing, and some new […]
4 Tips for Dating During Separation
Based upon my own journey through divorce, book research and work as a therapist, I say with certainty that those who are separated often crave validation and companionship to stave off loneliness. They often desire affection – especially after cold marriages without it – and sometimes, they desire just that…desire. These feelings are completely normal, but what […]
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