Help! This Divorce Hurts

When you are in the divorce process there is a pain that comes with it that is a reminder of all the good times, the way things were and why you were together in the first place.

I would not diminish the fact that the divorce process brings pain (I have been there) yet there is another way to look at it. The journey of life is not always smooth. There are lots of bumps and turns in the road.

Divorce could be just another name for possibility in your life. You have contributed a great deal to your relationship and for whatever reasons you have been given an opportunity to take a new look at your life. When you started your relationship you had dreams, hopes, and vitality for making something new that had not been there before. You have done all that.

Now you have the possibility to live a new life that could be even better than you might have imagined. I know it is a stretch to bring your mind to consider the option of starting something new again. This is where the possibility lies. In the midst of pain consider for just a moment, you are being shown a new door that you had not imagined was there.

Some people tell me they don’t want to leave their old life. It was so good they will say. However, when we look into it we can see the compromise, the dreams that have been left behind and the exhaustion of trying to make something work that has not worked for a long time.

You see, your heart is very intelligent. When asked, people can look into their heart for guidance and for a sense of what was really happening in the relationship. In many cases, they knew it was over for a long time. Denial is a strong motivator to keep things the same even if they are bad for us.

Now is the time. You have been given this opportunity to make a new life with all the skills and gifts you bring to the world. Many of these may not have been acknowledged before or for a long time. Renewal of one’s life along the path happens several times in our life. Take heart in the fact that others have done it before you and now it is your turn to shine.

I know you can do it. You have all the courage, imagination, creativity and heart that you need for this next phase. Don’t wait, start now.

Howard Parsons is a recognized expert in the field of divorce having worked with thousands of clients over twenty-five years. His book Moving On Through Divorce is available on Amazon.com.